How to Ease Money Worries in Tough Times

Are you a compulsive shopper?

2012-01-04T13:18:00.000-08:00

When I'm stressed, the mall is all," confessed my friend Karen. She owed $40,000 on her credit cards before she acknowledged her habit.

But did you know we can be compulsive shoppers even without piling up a big load of debt?

Olivia loved shoes and routinely bought five or six pairs at a time--but only on sale.
Dick called himself a collector, popular nomenclature for guys who delight in electronics, hardware, fishing flies and tools. Are you someone who has never seen a gadget you didn’t like?
Some moms shop compulsively--but only for their kids.
And how about the Santa Shopaholic who over-spends every Christmas?

If we don't buy for ourselves, and we manage our debt, it's harder to see shopping as a compulsion. But if you're starting to wonder as you start the new year, answer these 6 questions:

Do I use shopping an “outing”?
Do I buy things I want but don’t need?
Do I frequently buy on impulse?
Do I shop when I’m feeling stressed, sad or lonely?
Do I feel a rush when I purchase something?
Do I go regularly to E-bay, Craig’s List, or QVC?

The Shopper’s Prayer
Such glitter and pleasure in store aisles!
I pass one enticement; another appears.
What internal need does my shopping fill?
Is there a better way?
Little by little, help me see it, O Lord.

A Radical Idea

2010-08-30T10:36:00.000-07:00

Here's one way to ease money worries: buy fewer things.

I discovered what this means in a very personal way. When I first launched myself as a self-employed writer, I wasn't at all sure I would succeed. As the sole support of a household that included three children and a dog, I knew I had to be frugal. So I began asking a simple question before every purchase: "Is this necessary for life or death?"

Try it next time you go to the store, even the grocery store where impulse items like candy and magazines lie in wait at check-out.

Here's the wondrous thing I learned: although my buying habits changed, my standard of living did not.
We had enough to eat. Household bills got paid. There was gas in my car. I merely gave up impulse items like shoes I didn't need.

I rediscovered the library. And thrift stores. And home cooking. It became almost like a game to discover how little I needed to buy once I asked that question.

"Freedom from want" took on a whole new meaning.
Try it yourself for a week.

She saves, he spends, He saves, She spends

2010-06-20T10:55:00.000-07:00

Do you and your partner have different ideas about money?

I read this humorous, insightful take on the subject: “There are two kinds of people in this world: those who enjoy saving carefully for the sailboat they plan to buy someday and those who buy the sailboat on credit so they can have the fun of sailing right now. Inevitably, the two marry each other.”

If money is an issue in your relationship, try this prayer for harmony, from my book GRACE ON THE GO: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries:

“Dear God, my partner and I share so many values.
But money differences are driving us apart.
Help both of us realize that our spend-or-save choices
Are neither right nor wrong.
Just different.
Help both of us listen to each other’s point of view, and
Seek to understand it.
Help both of us agree on our financial goals

And help us find a middle way to get there,

Remembering that everything is a gift from our Creator

And must be cared for in harmony.”

Death and Taxes? How about Prayer and Taxes?

2010-04-15T11:53:00.000-07:00

If "April is the cruelest month" as the poet said, then April 15 can seem like the cruelest day. It's the day we pony up and pay our taxes. I had a throwback moment myself--a moment of acknowledging some tough financial truths that made me gulp a bit... but I'm not going to fall into old habits of scarcity thinking.

Instead, I'm going to give thanks for all I have that can't be counted in coin...my good health, my family, my friends.
I'm going to consider all those things I tend to take for granted--roads and bridges and schools and programs that help the sick and poor--all those things that my taxes pay for.

And I'll remember this prayer to a benevolent Creator:
Extravagant God! Who scatters the stars like seed pearls across the night sky
You do not hold back form the universe. I have faith you won't hold back from me.

Tempted to do something you can't afford?

2010-01-31T20:42:00.000-08:00

Sometimes it is hard to say No to a fun event just because it's not in your budget. I love to bicycle and ten of my fellow cyclists are flying to Paris and then bicycling in France for a week. It sounded so wonderful, I immediately signed on.

But then...the cost of the trip began to go up. Air fare, the euro-dollar exchange rate, hotels in Paris...pretty soon it the cost was $1200 more than originally quoted. Part of me said, "Do it anyway! This chance won't come again!" Another part of me said, "You'll be broke afterward. It will take all your cushion."

So here's what I decided: I turned down the trip to France AND immediately signed up instead for a week-long bicycle ride in Wisconsin with some other bike buddies. The cost is one-tenth of the European trip

Okay, so I won't have Paris...but I'll always have Milwaukee. And Milwaukee is a lovely city with an outstanding art museum

Point being: If we stay flexible in our thinking, we can find ways to enjoy ourselves...and do it in an affordable way. There is always more than one answer. Instead of whining about what can't be done, follow my lead. Figure out what you can do.

When Fire Takes It All

2009-09-04T12:33:00.000-07:00

While watching the Southern CA wildfires on TV and the loss of many homes, I thought about Marcia and Brad, whom I interviewed after they lost their house to fire. It burned to the ground, taking everything with it, but family members all got out alive, even the dog. At first, she was so grateful for their lives that Marcia could only say to herself, "We’re alive. That’s what counts. Thank you, God."

Then day to day reality set in.
For weeks afterward, she would start to say, “Oh, I’ll get the—“ and then stop, realizing. "It’s gone. Everything is gone."
Insurance replaced some of it. But none of the really important things could be retrieved. The family heirlooms. The kids’ baby photos. The letter Brad had written her on their tenth anniversary. And yet—

They were alive. That's what mattered. But at the same time, Marcia felt so sad. And guilty about feeing sad. "They are only things," she reminded herself.

Is it shameful to grieve over lost possessions?

Of course you grieve! While some objects can be replaced, others –the ones that hold family memories--are irreplaceable. Many circumstances can prompt the loss of meaningful personal possessions. A hurricane or tornado. A move into a nursing home. A mortgage foreclosure. A divorce.

If you should lose the important memorabilia of your life, give yourself permission to cry. You need to acknowledge your losses in the same way you do when a person dies.

The stages of grief must still be borne. Feelings of sadness are very real. Evenven when what we grieve are "only" possessions, we cannot really go forward until our griefs are honestly acknowledged and experienced--without guilt or shame.

DIsagree about money?

2009-08-19T08:27:00.000-07:00

Here's a humorous take on money arguments between couples: "There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who enjoy saving carefully for the sailboat they plan to buy one day. And those who buy the sailboat on credit so they can have the fun of sailing right now. Inevitably, the two marry each other."

If you're in disagreement over money issues, Sit down with your partner and each agree to write a money autobiography. Start by describing your parents' attitudes about money. What did money symbolize to you at age 10? 15? 20? 30? Is it Success? Security? Fear? Lack? Desire? Power? Pleasure? Do you have a particularly strong memory, happy or sad, that involves money?

As you read yours and your partner's autobigraphies, you'll begin to see where your attitudes, assumptions, and values came from. It can help you understand your partner's seemingly erratic behavior around money; and can help each of you make some behavioral changes. In my GRACE ON THE GO book about money, I include this prayer:

"Dear God, my partner and I share so many values.
But money differences are driving us apart.
Help both of us realize that our spend-or-save choices
Are neither right nor wrong.
Just different.
Help both us of us listen to each other's point of view and
Seek to understand.
Help both of us agree on our financial goals
And help us find a middle way to get there."

A reprint from United Methodist Reporter

2009-08-13T10:42:00.000-07:00

I thought you might enjoy this Q&A by Mary Jacobs, a writer for the United Methodist Reporter.

"With the economy as bad as it is, are you worried that you haven’t got a prayer?
In her book, Grace on the Go: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries (Morehouse, 2009), Barbara Bartocci offers words of encouragement and practical tips.

Q: A lot of people are worried right now. What insight can you offer?

Worry is like prayer to the wrong god. We think we are focusing on the problem and somehow doing something about it. But worry puts our mind into obsessive, negative thinking. We're not problem-solving. We're obsessing.

When you catch yourself worrying, literally say the word “Stop.” Psychologists tell us that our minds will only hold one thing at a time. Once we stop the worried thought, we can put in something to take its place. I suggest a short, affirmative prayer such as, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” or “If God is with me, who can be against me?” Repeat this prayer until it is fixed in your consciousness, replacing the worry.

Another action step: if you feel you can’t give up worry altogether, then limit the time you spend on it. Mentally, put all your worry into a big canvas bag.Once a day take the worry out and wallow in it for a certain period of time—no more than 15 minutes—then mentally stuff the worry back into the bag and say this prayer: “Thank you, God. I am now worry-free until this time tomorrow.” Psychologically, by not trying to get rid of worry altogether, you have made it manageable.

Q: You describe a technique you call “prayerful brainstorming.” Explain.

It's a way to look at worry from a problem-solving perspective. Imagine that a friend has come to you with the same concern you’re facing. What would you advise? Jot down every idea that comes to you. Some will seem farfetched, but there’s going to come one idea you can use. It may call on you to live in a way that is different from your ideal lifestyle. But if you stay faithful, believing that God will be with you, you can brainstorm a way out of your problems.

We live in a culture that has mixed-up needs with wants. I believe the statement, “If you strive for the kingdom of God, all else you need will be given to you.” Maybe not everything you want, but what you need.

Q: Without discounting the pain, are there “lessons learned” from this recession?

Yes, we're re-learning what really counts. I have a chapter in my book titled “Happiness: Priceless." A study asked people, “Would you like more income?” Whether someone earned $5000, $50,000 or $500,000 a year, every person replied, "Yes. Sure."

“But when the question was asked, “What do you need to make you happy?” money was No. 14 on the list. First on the list is the loving concern and care of friends and family.

Q:So what’s your advice for dealing with money worries?

Follow these 19 words:
“Clutter less. Pray more. Consume less. Give more. Want less. Enjoy more. And always, always give thanks to God.”
mjacobs@umr.org"

Face the truth about your debt

2009-06-11T04:31:00.000-07:00

Kali, a divorced single mom, was so afraid to look at her bills that she tossed them, unopened, into her closet. Somehow she fooled herself into thinking that if she didn’t see them, they would go away.
For a long time, Liz couldn’t bring herself to check her credit rating.
Isabella had not acknowledged the full extent of her credit card debt until she began a series of credit counseling meetings at her church.
Facing up to everything we owe can be difficult. Keeping secrets—whether from ourselves or from others---takes a steep emotional toll. There is something freeing about facing the truth. See if this prayer helps you.
The Naming Prayer
I am naming it.
My debt.
I owe $ (fill in the blank)
It’s a heavy weight.I feel as if it could crush me.
But like Jesus bidding Peter to walk across the water,
You are bidding me to walk out in faith.
If I get discouraged and cry, “Lord save me!”
Please reach out your hand as you did to Peter.
I am willing but weak,
Yet I know with your help,
I can lift this weight from my life.

19 Words To Live By in Tough Times

2009-05-12T08:36:00.000-07:00

Clutter less
Pray more
Consume less
Give more
Want less
Enjoy more
And always, always, give thanks to God.
These 19 words are from my newest book, Grace on the Go: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries. (Morehouse Press, April,2009, $10.)Here are 3 quick ways to act on the words above.

3 Quick Ways to Clutter Less
1) Track in a notebook for a week how you spend your time and your money. These are two great clues to our real values.
2) Practice mindfulness. Breathe slowly. Pay attention to the present moment. Sometimes the worst clutter is in our minds. We twitter, we text, we link in, we email. I-phones, 24-7. A little silence can be a big thing.But, “…The best-informed man is not necessarily the wisest…” (Dietrich Boenhoffer)
3) Clear your work space before beginning your next task. Notice how free you feel when your workspace is clear.

3 Quick Ways to Pray More
1)Begin each day with gratitude. Say aloud, as you get up,
“I rejoice!”
2)Put a spiritual spin on tasks you’re already doing. Morning shower: “May I be cleansed of any lingering resentments.” While filling your car with gas: “Fill me with loving compassion toward everyone I meet today.”
3)Since prayer is a form of thinking, watch how you think. Notice a negative thought? Say out loud, “Stop!” Then insert a positive thought or a quick prayer. “Jesus, have mercy. Christ have mercy” is one I like.

3 Quick Ways to Consume Less
1)Before buying anything, ask the question: “Is this necessary for life or death?”
2)If you bring something new into your life, give away something you already have at the same time.
3)Eat smaller portions. Live in smaller spaces. Say no to meaningless activities that merely pass time.

3 Quick Ways to Give More
1)Giving and receiving are part of a universal energy flow. People in the flow of giving will receive, though not necessarily from the person to whom they give.
2)If you were not raised to be comfortable in giving, start small. Send a small donation to a good cause. Writing a check to another reminds us that we do have more than we need.
3)Lend your time to someone going through a hard patch. Run errands for an invalid. Donate blood. Walk a neighbor’s dog. Build your trust in giving by remembering all you have received.

3 Quick Ways to Want Less
1)Stop comparing with others who appear to have more. Affluence does not protect anyone from the challenges of being human.
2)Appreciate what you already have. A family heirloom. Tulips in your garden. A comfortable bed. Loving relationships.
3)When looking at an ad or at an item on sale, ask: “Do I need this?” Pay attention to the answer. Corollary: Will my life really be less happy without this?

3 Quick Ways to Enjoy More
1)Studies show that positive life experiences gain importance in our memories, while material purchases lose value as time goes on. Pay attention to your life as it's happening now!
2)Choose your attitude. Research shows when we “act-as-if”, our emotions follow our behavior. Up or down.
3)Laugh more. Look for the humor in ordinary life experiences.

And always, always, give thanks to God!Or to the universe or to the Creator or to universal mind…whatever word you use, believe. And ultimately, all shall be well.

The copy above is for your use. Credit should be given to Barbara Bartocci, author,
Grace on the Go: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries,
Morehouse Press, $10, pub date April 2009.

For a review copy of my book,
wmailto:NFitzegeral@cpg.org

Living Authentically

2009-02-11T09:15:00.000-08:00

Peter and Sarah are haunted by a secret. They live in an upscale neighborhood of houses with three-car garages. Entry halls with cathedral ceilings. Bathrooms as big as bedrooms used to be. There are tennis courts and soccer fields. Good schools.
But their secret is… they can’t afford to live there.
They moved in when times were good, and now times aren’t so good. “We were stretched from the beginning,” admits Sarah.
It’s not only their house. They feel as if they’re “expected” to participate socially in ways they can’t afford. Like the expensive summer camp where all their kids’ friends are going. In trying to keep up, they maxed their credit cards, and are making minimum payments. “The interest rate is killing us," says Sarah. But what else can we do?”
The obvious answer is to move. Move to a neighborhood they can afford. But that means facing a reality that Peter and Sarah aren’t yet prepared to do.
There is a heavy cost in trying desperately to “keep up with the Joneses.” It’s more than financial. Peter and Sarah aren’t living an authentic life. They’re pretending to be who they’re not.
Being real—with ourselves and with others---is the pathway to inner peace. It means acknowledging the truth about where you are financially. Never mind comparing or trying to keep up with anyone else.

Try this: A Prayer to be Real
I am living beyond my means.
And I am not at peace.
I want to live an authentic life
And not lean on outward show
But I’m scared,
Afraid that by myself I won’t be enough.
Help me face my fear.
Help me believe that I am enough.
When I embrace Reality,
I will find peace because
Reality is another name for God.
This comes from my new book, Grace on the Go: Prayers to Ease Money Worries

Is this any way to ease money worries?

2009-01-26T13:01:00.000-08:00

Here is my confession. After starting my blog, I set it aside to finish writing my newest book, GRACE ON THE GO: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries which is being published by Morehouse Press (an Imprint of Church Publishing) in April, 2009.

Anyone reading this who is a writer by profession knows that there comes a time when deadlines decide your life. In order to meet my publisher's deadline, I stopped doing anything other than work on my book manuscript.
And I finished on time!

Here are the chapter headings:
Worried!
It Isn't Fair!
Do I Need It or Do I Want It?
A Matter of Life and Debt
"I feel ashamed!"
He Spends, She Saves, She Saves, He Spends
Choosing Simple Abundance
Glory Be for the Gift of Giving
Happiness? Pricesless!
Trouble Spots

Are you sure you don't have enough?

2008-09-23T07:21:00.000-07:00

Three years, ago, well-to-do friends of mine, “Nancy and Phil” went on a high-ticket cruise among the Greek islands. Theirs was a luxurious small ship, so the passengers soon became acquainted. Phil, who holds a top-level position in a Midwest corporation, discovered that his fellow passengers held similar or better positions in much bigger East Coast companies, with commensurate incomes.
“Phil fell into such a funk,” Nancy confided later. “He began belittling himself because he wasn’t ‘as important or as rich’as the others. By the time he regained some perspective, he had wasted half the cruise with his ridiculous comparisons.”
It’s all relative, isn’t it?
Before deciding you don’t have enough, consider:
o How many square feet are in your house or apartment? In some societies, two or more families share as little as 600 square feet.
o Do you wish you could lose five or ten pounds? Then apparently, you’re getting enough to eat. Globally, one out of every five human beings is malnourished.
o Do you and your spouse own two cars? It’s not universally possible, but ever since gas topped $4 a gallon, more and more people have discovered busses, bicycles and old-fashioned walking as a means of getting somewhere. Oh, and did I mention carpools?
o I’m a former smoker who remembers how hard it was to quit, so if you smoke, you have my sympathy. But did you know your habit costs your family $41 per pack? That’s according to the Center for Health, Policy, Law and Management at Duke University [Study at the Terry Sanford Institute of Public Policy reported in USA Today, Nov 26, 04 posted on line.] who added up a pack of cigarettes, plus taxes, insurance, medical care and lost earnings due to smoking-related disabilities over an adult lifetime.
This is not meant to guilt-trip any smokers because it is a powerful addiction. It just means that before we think we don’t have enough, we need to look clearly at how we spend our money now.

Where does a dollar go?

2008-09-10T06:56:00.000-07:00

What would you do if you discovered, on the bottom edge of a dollar bill you got in change, this handwritten message: "Where does a dollar go? Send me a postcard. [Address] Have a great day!"
Would you answer? When I last talked to Midwest artist Dean Bracy, the man who sent out 10,000 of these dollar bills, more than 6,500 people had replied. And they sent more than postcards: Some sent travel brochures, maps, menus, bumper stickers, refrigerator magnets, baseball cards, even a pumpkin. People detailed their lives, politics and their towns…all to a stranger whom they’d never met.

Bracy's dollars turned up around the globe. They appeared at the scene of a crime, as a gift to a newborn, and in the garter of an exotic dancer. They were wagered by gamblers and given to charities. " [To read my complete story, as published in Readers Digest, go to the Articles link on my website, http://www.BarbaraBartocci.com]

Now pick up and hold a dollar bill. Where has this dollar been? Where will it go? You are holding what Joseph Campbell called “congealed energy.” We live in a universe made up of energy, and money is just one aspect.
In her excellent book, The Energy of Money, psychologist Maria Nemeth, PhD, says our relationship with money is really the hero’s journey in which we enter unknown territory, encounter fears, mysteries and mentors, and eventually—if we are willing—gain a sense of mastery.
What kind of emotional energy do you feel around money? A good way to find out is to write a money autobiography. Write for 10 minutes by hand or on your computer starting with this phrase: “I first learned about money when I was…”
What do you discover after writing for ten minutes?

Rethinking Wants vs. Needs

2008-08-19T14:38:00.000-07:00

Here’s my admission: As I write this blog—and entreat your comments as readers—I will also be writing the newest in my series of Grace on the Go books: It’s entitled Grace on the Go: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries.
As I blog, I hope to share my own ideas and also receive your good ideas about ways we can change our consciousness about money—in a positive way.
Scripture says, “As a man (or woman) thinketh in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7). So I suggest that the first thing anyone caught in financial turmoil should do is re-think.
I come from a Christian background, but even those who don’t will acknowledge Jesus as a great Teacher, and he encouraged his followers to live free of worry about money. He promised that if they would seek the kingdom of God, all else that they needed would be theirs as well.
From China, the ancient Tao te Ching says, “If you realize you have enough, you are truly rich.”
Whoa, here’s the rub. Notice the operative words:
“All that you need.”
And, “Realizing you have enough.”
How do those two concepts square with our consumer-driven culture? For many years, I did my share of bowing before the Consumer Goddess. I didn’t over-spend, but I never became comfortable with just what I had. As I ruefully told a friend one day: “I drive through Mission Hills (our city’s best neighborhood) and think, ‘Wasn’t I supposed to live here?’”
The reality was, I lived in a perfectly comfortable house. I didn’t need to live in Mission Hills. Living in the “best” neighborhood was simply an ego-driven desire.
Part of my life’s journey has been to learn
o How to put the kingdom of God first as a goal.
o How to recognize and be content that I have enough.
How about you? Where are you on the journey?

What does "grace" have to do with money?

2008-08-19T08:48:00.000-07:00

Here’s my confession: As I write this blog—and entreat your comments as readers—I will also be writing the newest in my series of Grace on the Go books: It’s entitled Grace on the Go: Powerful Prayers to Ease Money Worries.
As I blog, I hope to share my own ideas and also receive your good ideas about ways we can change our consciousness about money. Isn’t that part of prayer?
“As a man (or woman) thinketh in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7).
So I suggest the first thing anyone who is caught in financial turmoil should do is re-think.
I come from a Christian background, but even those who don’t will acknowledge Jesus as a great Teacher, and he encouraged his followers to live free of worry about money. He promised that if they would seek the kingdom of God, all else that they needed would be theirs as well. (The Tao says, “If you realize you have enough, you are truly rich.”)
What is God’s kingdom? Author Richard McBrien says, “We find God’s kingdom in everyday personal experiences. Whenever people show love to one another, forgive one another, or bear one another’s burdens, there is God’s kingdom.”
Here’s what I’ve noticed—and I imagine you have too: when things get scarce--when we get scared that we might not have enough—the ideas behind “loving one another” may go right out the window. Suddenly, we’re most concerned about ourselves. How do I keep what I have? How do I get more before it disappears?
I titled this blog, “92 best ideas” and my second idea is probably the hardest to implement because it involves faith. Not faith in some religious doctrine, but faith in the laws of the universe, and one of those laws says, “There is a cycle of giving-and-receiving. As you give, you will receive. "

Are your money worries real?

2008-07-30T19:13:00.001-07:00

Years ago I worried a lot about money. I was always insecure. Afraid I wouldn’t have enough. In my fear, I sometimes pictured myself in the middle of a deep, dark forest (the kind that swallowed up Little Red Riding Hood) and through the trees I would see the red, glittering wolves eyes…”Ready to eat you my dear, if your bank account falls below a certain level.”
I had another vision too, one I learned is shared by many women: I pictured myself in the future as a homeless old bag lady pushing my shopping cart with my cat (and I don’t even own a cat.)
Occasionally I wondered: where did my fears came from? I grew up in a standard-issue, middle-class family. My mom sometimes hollered, “If you kids don’t turn out the lights, you’ll send us to the poorhouse!” But in reality, I’ve never been poor.
Even as a self-employed writer, I’ve managed to earn “enough.”
Here’s what I’ve learned. Our worries and fears---about money or anything else—start inside our heads. And they may—or may not--be hooked to reality.
So the first of the 92 best ideas to ease money worries is this: Figure out if your worries are real (Losing your home or owing $50,000 on your credit card—a situation that actually existed for a friend of mine--- would be classed as “real.” )
OR do your worries exist primarily in your head, spurred on by the media’s fearful headlines or your own confusion between “wants” vs. actual “needs.”?
Maybe the wolves eyes are only in your imagination.
Now let me ask you—what ideas do you have to ease money worries? My years in creative work taught me that the very best ideas come from BRAINSTORMING….so let’s storm our brains TOGETHER. Here are the questions for today's poll:
QUESTION 1: When your thoughts do turn fearful about money, what “picture” pops into your head?
QUESTION 2: What are your ideas about ways to manage fearful thoughts?

92 Best Ways to Ease Money Worries & Feel Affluent

2008-07-30T16:34:00.000-07:00

Hello, and Welcome. And guess what? You and I are going to create those 92 ways to ease money worries TOGETHER. I have ideas--a bunch of 'em actually-- but in my years of working on creative projects, I've learned the value of BRAINSTORMING.

So...my invitation is...let's storm our brains together. I'll start out with my ideas for easing money worries and I hope everyone who reads this blog will chime in with your ideas. Then, in OCTOBER, we'll do some voting to find the very BEST 92 ideas.

Now, here's my confession: I have a hidden agenda. I'm starting to work on the next book in my Grace on the Go series, and it's all about--gulp--prayers to help ease money worries. But besides the value of brainstorming, I've also learned that God helps those who help themselves and sometimes grace comes upon us through the good ideas and helping hands of others. That's why I decided to begin this blog--to both give and get help from others.

You know, years ago, whenever I thought about money, I felt as if I were sitting in a deep, dark forest (the kind that swallowed up Little Red Riding Hood) and in the shadows of trees I could see the red glittering eyes of hungry wolves.

I had another vision, too; one that I discovered I share with many women. I would picture myself in the future as a poor, homeless old bag lady pushing a shopping cart with my cat (and I don't even own a cat!)

Sometimes I wondered, why am I afraid of ending my life in poverty? I've never been poor. I grew up in a standard-issue middle-class family. My mom sometimes said, "You'll send us to the poorhouse if you don't start turning off lights when you leave a room!" but really, we had enough. More than enough, probably.

I've been a self-employed writer for nearly 30 years and made an okay living.

But here's something I've learned: part of easing any worry has to do with how we think. So

I'm going to conclude this post with Best Way Number 1: Figure out if your money worries are valid (i.e. the sheriff is coming to take the house or you owe $50,000 in credit card debt which actually afflicted one of my friends) or...are you worries in part a figment of an overactive imagination and too many current scare headlines in the media?